Who Are You?

Not your FaceBook description, and not what you do.

But who are YOU?

This is sometimes a tough thing to figure out. Up to this point in your life, most of your life is about what you have to do-go to class, get a grade, go to sports practice, go to work, etc. All of these things contribute to who you are, but they actually are not you.

It’s all well and good to know how you would describe yourself, but that is usually just a snapshot of what you are doing at this point in time. We also need to understand what brought you here and what is taking you into the future. Because once we understand what drives you, we have a lot better idea how to get you down the road to your future, and how fast to take you there.

What Are You Capable Of?

ANYTHING!!

What things would you try-how bold would you be, how extreme would you get-if you knew that, magically, you could not fail? This very powerful question points to one thing: attack anything you want to accomplish without even the smallest thought that failing was an option. If you really go after an idea without fear or hesitation, you could surprise even yourself with what you’re capable of.

We’ve each got somewhere within ourselves a "best self." You’ve probably seen them only a few times before-they’re the ones who really prepared for the test and nailed it, or who practiced a specific shot in case they needed it, and then needed it, and made it; or they’re the one who noticed that a friend was in need, and put aside their own issues to help out.

Every once in a while, we get to watch somebody else’s "best self" light the world on fire. Tiger Woods has rattled off a streak of seven straight tournament victories, and even he didn’t really realize that that was possible.

These "best self" streaks are rare and wonderful-and absolutely necessary for you to understand your place in the world. We all get very content in our lives considering what our everyday self is capable of, and then making decisions based on that. Imagine how different your life could be if you just made every decision with the idea that it would be your "best self" acting out that decision.

How Do You Get Smarter Sooner?

Wouldn’t it be great to be able to have a conversation between the "you" at 55 and you at 18, or 20, or 24?  You could have the benefit of 37 years of experience and learn quicker so life could be more enjoyable and you could accomplish much more.

We want to make you better prepared for "life’s lessons" We’re not taking away the lessons and experiences that you will go through (what fun is that?), but rather making you better able to handle the problems, experiences and "road bumps" that life will bring.

And it all starts with taking responsibility for your life-stop making excuses or living in the past, make smart choices in who you surround yourself with, learn to listen to yourself, and be proactive in your own interest. This is how you begin to position yourself for your future.

But that’s not enough. Your future requires a lot more from you than simply getting yourself grounded right now. Pretty soon you’re going to have to start making decisions that are all a lot more important and impactful on your life than anything you’ve done before. And you have no training for this.

So we have to establish a Vision for your future, and that Vision is going involve setting Goals along the way so you know how you’re making progress, and then we start exercising some Foresight, so you can see the pitfalls and you can find the help you need.

It’s not that important. Just the rest of your life.

You can either have that life by your own design, or you can stumble out into the world and hope things work out. Your choice.

How Do You Keep Your Mistakes Manageable?

You’re going to make mistakes. In fact, you’re SUPPOSED to make mistakes. But there are simply too many mistakes out there that you could make for you to make all of them.

And some of you have tried.

So why not start developing a couple of great habits like learning from other people’s mistakes-so you don’t have to make them for yourself-and taking a moment after one of you own mistakes-so you don’t make the next mistake, which is probably going to be worse. The hope is that you can somehow avoid the big, life-altering mistakes that limit your ability to pursue your Vision.

But that does not necessarily mean being "careful." There are risks that are worth taking, there are some lessons that you can only learn by sticking your neck out a little bit. But these risks and lessons are only worth it if they open up possibilities for your Vision to come true. For instance, that jump out the third floor window into the hotel swimming pool is a risk, but with very little upside; taking out a large small business loan is also a risk, but it is one that could do great things for your future.

How Do You Get Along In All Situations With Everyone?

Let us first tell you that that’s impossible. You will not get along with everyone. We don’t live in utopia, and we don’t want to live in utopia. What we’re trying to do is get along with as many people as we can; but what we really have to do is coexist with everybody you run into.

If we had to boil it down to one simple "truism," that would be this: treat everybody-EVERYBODY-as if they are wearing an invisible sign that says "make me feel important." If you strive to accomplish this, you will humanize your relationships, you will motivate others to want to be around you, you will be a source of light, you will be showing a little humility, and you will show by your actions that you value people. There is no greater way to get along with everybody than to add value to others’ lives in this way. And in return, we promise that you will get a ton more value in your life from these individuals.

How Do You Combine Passions and Career?
(Or, What Do You REALLY Want To Do?)

This is not a book about career. It’s about Getting It-which is to say that we want you to have a happy, balanced life of direction and successes. The fact that cannot be disputed is that as soon as school is done, work will take up about one-third of your life. In fact, it effects a lot more than 1/3 of your life if you are miserable, and a "bad day at the office" carries over to a bad night or a bad weekend. What we want to help you accomplish is making that 1/3 of your life meaningful, and a good experience.

The first step is to identify your passions-figure out what drives you and what makes you get out of bed in the morning.

The second step is research-identify jobs and careers that will give you the opportunity to pursue that passion.

The third step is investment-spend some time and some energy shadowing people who work some of those jobs and careers that you identified in step two.

And the fourth step is grab a hold of your Vision, set Goals for yourself, look around and find resources that can help you and identify possible pitfalls . . .

AND GET TO WORK! Be bold in the pursuit of your Vision and do NOT let anybody deter you from your course.

How Do Get Out Of Your Box and MAKE THIS WORK FOR YOU?

Stretching is uncomfortable, both physically and spiritually. When you stretch your body, you try to get muscles to behave in a way that they are not used to-and that is not easy, nor is it painless. If you think about a person who has been studying yoga for a long time, they move with an ease and a grace speaks of effortlessness and freedom. Their body does not hinder them in any way. If, on the other hand, you imagine your ordinary, middle-aged weekend warrior playing basketball once a week with his buddies, you see a man who moves with a stiffness and a sense of effort. His body is definitely a hindrance. The weekend warrior would be much better off with a little stretching during the week.

Most people are like the weekend warrior, spiritually speaking and in their everyday life. They only every once in a while attempt anything "new" or "different," preferring to be safe and comfortable. But every choice becomes a dilemma, every difficulty a problem, all because their decision-making process is stiff and uncertain.

Building your Perfect Life is going to require more from you than that. You have to start making calculated, unusual decisions for your life-start small, by doing something like brushing your teeth differently. Then build up to more important decisions. Eventually, when it comes time to make a really big decision, you won’t be locked in a stiff and safe decisions-making process, and you will be able to be bold in designing your Perfect Life.

Which is the only way to Make It Work!